Tag Archives: school counseling

On Contribution – A Year of Writing

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How do you feel like you contribute to the world through your vocation?
In my current vocational shift, I believe that I am disrupting a harmful institution that is public education by making efforts to educate and empower folks with children that have experienced trauma to build and create safe spaces for their learning and potential. In my mentorship with school counselors, I believe I am planting seeds of creativity and innovation in the field so that more students are impacted by proactive mental health strategies and social emotional learning that will impact their lives as adults in relationship with others. My greatest pride in the last 16 years of my career is watching school counselors that I have mentored or supervised have meaningful interactions with students, families and staff members knowing them being in that role is making a difference in that life.

A bunch of lovely counselors at our state conference last year!

How do you contribute to your family or friend group on a regular basis?
Particularly in response to contributing to my family, I hope that at the of their lives, they will know without a doubt that I loved them UNCONDITIONALLY. That their trauma and abuse was not their fault and that no amount of behavior will change the way I feel about them. HOWEVER, I also hope they learn that without healing, their past hurts will show up and damage other folks in their path. That without doing the extremely hard work of healing, they will be responsible for the outcomes of their hurt and abuse by lying, cheating, seeking control, etc. I heard a quote on Glennon Doyle’s podcast that said “it may not be your fault, but it still is your problem” and that really resonated with me as I work with folks that have experienced abuses and trauma far outside of their control. The other contribution I believe I am making to my children in particular is a simple one….I’m not going anywhere. I am sticking this out with you. I want to support you. When you hurt me, boundaries will need to be put into place, but I will continue to be there/support/love you.

Is there a meaningful giving experience you’d like to plan for in the future? Write about it.
One aspect of working with children that I never had sufficient time for as a school counselor was deeply working in supporting the parents. Walking alongside them in navigating for their students’ needs and affirming the hard and exhausting work they are doing while experiencing intensive vicarious trauma. That is something I want to move into with my new business venture….parenting groups, advocacy in school team meetings, personal parent coaching – I am so looking forward to just being in community with these parents and helping wherever I can in their journies. And bonus dream, I would LOVE to make enough money through alternative streams of income, that I can offer these services free of charge. We are nowhere near that goal as of now, but working slowly but surely in making it happen.

On Work – A Year of Writing

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What is your dream job?
If you were to ask me what my dream job was at any point between 2007-2023, I would have told you with 100% confidence that I had it. I was an elementary school counselor, a role I am utterly obsessed with (reference point, my tik tok page) and felt fulfilled as a varsity volleyball coach for an elite volleyball program in the hometown and school that raised me and made me who I am today. These were two jobs that I committed my heart and education to early on as a high schooler and did everything in my power to achieve those goals. Those careers were everything to me – I loved stepping into others’ lives during vulnerable moments, whether it was a crisis at school or coaching teenagers through the ups and downs of sports, life and love during their most formative years, I felt like I was contributing to individual lives and improving our community as a whole. I also felt incredibly valued by others – although criticism was there in small amounts, mostly I felt overwhelming gratitude and positivity coming from those I was DIRECTLY involved with (folks that indirectly heard things are a whole different story).

What are your work values? Think of values that bring you emotional fulfillment (being challenged, helping others, influence, etc.) as well as external things that you value (high earnings, job security, having adequate time away from work, etc.)
When I resigned from my school counseling position this last August, I made the decision by reflecting on both my personal and professional values and deciding whether or not my current place of employment would support those values. And at first, I thought maybe my personal and professional values would be different but the more I was curious and explored, the more I realized there were exactly the same. Connection and growth – to grow as a person and profession, we have to feel safe and supported. The only way to do that is through genuine connection and trust. Another important value to me is integrity, and as I define it, authenticity and “realness” – I want to hear your struggles AND your strengths and I want to make sure I am public about mine as well. My blog and my social media show the highlights and the hard parts and I am proud of that. My other values include compassion, empowerment, balance, unconditional love and VALUE (to be valued and to add value to others’ lives).

Do you feel like you need to work toward a change in your career or vocation? Why?
So now that I have been wiped bare in many senses of the word, I have the opportunity to build back my career and my path with these values in place and guiding the way. It is still quite foggy what that looks like and I am learning how to accept that is just what it is for the time being and it won’t feel that way forever. I know I love school counseling and school counselors and would love to keep supporting that work. I know I love working with humans with trauma, both the big and little humans and want to keep that passion area of mine alive in order to help move our collective understanding of it forward both in individual homes and in large systems as well. I feel right at now at this very moment, I am one of those mystery picture puzzles…..where you see just a few pieces at a time and you have to be patient in order to see the resulting final picture…..and for now, waiting for that will be both my daily struggle and my daily opportunity for acceptance and grace.

On School Counseling resources – back to school sale!

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I started a Teachers Pay Teachers store this past year and have been uploading different resources I’ve used over the past 15 years to maintain a comprehensive school counseling program. I am passionate about the power of data-driven decisions that support students and some of these tools help with the organization and advocacy for counseling programs!

In honor of the sale today and tomorrow, I thought I’d do a round up of the resources that are on sale and how they will help you stay organized this school year (and save a little bit of time along the way – these are all grab, edit and go type templates).

School Counseling Time Tracker
This resource is my most shared, most requested tool for tracking your activities as a school counselor. This comprehensive Excel notebook includes the graphs and charts you need to communicate with stakeholders already finished – when you add your student and family visit data, the graphs and charts automatically change with your data! I use this tool to determine whether or not my program is meeting my goals as well as a vital piece of advocating for my position. Click here to view and/or purchase.

Only $12 on sale – August 2nd and 3rd.

Voice and Choice Behavior Prompts Worksheet
I do a lot of trainings on kids with trauma and how to respond to their behavior in a calm and regulated way (the trickiest part). I compiled an easy “if this behavior, then say this” worksheet to give out during these trainings and it is available here. This is a great worksheet to get all caregivers on the same page in a household or an entire student’s team at school. Using constant language is key to improving student trauma responses.

I would HIGHLY recommend this for new school counselors and/or teachers…..helping coach teachers and parents in behavior management was one of my biggest learning curves when I first started and this resource would have been so helpful for me back in my newbie days.

$2.40 on sale!

Bullying Prevention – Family Resource Packet
Great resource to send home in the Fall of a school year to describe what your school does when a student reports bullying. It also includes bullying report forms (editable) and a school district policy that students and caregivers can sign after reviewing. At our school, we collect these and use them between our admin team to keep track of and better document bullying reports.

$4.00 on sale!

School Counseling Program Calendar
This is a great tool to align programs across the district and would help communicate the role of the school counselor.

$2.40 on sale

Reset Room Resources
I love the work and care that we have put into creating a reset room at my current school. It is a safe space where students can access both a regulated adult and a space with regulation tools when needed. Taking a break is such a vital coping strategy for students and staff alike – but setting up the procedures of the room can be tricky so these resources can help! If you’d like to see a video of how we use our reset room (taken last year in the midst of Covid restrictions), click here.

Reset Room Planning Template

Reset Room Rules Poster – FREE!

School Counseling Program BUNDLE
And because I like a deal, if you want my entire library of resources for only $25 – click here!

All 9 items in my store included for only $25!

Well if you made it this far, thanks for following along. I love collaborating with and training new school counselors and educators – sharing these resources to make their job just a teeny bit easier brings me great joy!!!

18/40 – on how I chose my career path

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I had a very privileged experience in my school journey and absolutely fell in love with school. The school supplies, the relationships with teachers, and yes even the actual learning excited me enough to want to work in that field for the rest of my life. However, there was a knowing inside of me that knew classroom teaching wasn’t the path….so I had to explore some other options. For my 18th “moment”, I thought I would highlight a few different moments where I knew what I wanted to pursue in my career.

With an interest in psychology and human behavior (although this wasn’t labeled for me until well into high school taking my first psych class – thank you Mr. Demorest), I began to explore options that combined school and psychology.

My senior year, I distinctly remember an experience where I was required to do a job shadow and I chose a school psychologist (literal combination of school and psychology – haha). And while I completely admire and value what school psychologists do….this experience showed me this was a career I was NOT interested in. That school psychologist (I wish I knew who it was) introduced me to school counseling and thought it might be more what I was looking for in the education field (working with a wide range of students, experiential learning, impact on emotions, preventing child abuse, etc.)….since I hadn’t had much experience with counselors up to that point, this was all new to me and I was excited to learn more. I’m not even sure if job shadows are still a thing…..but this particular experience was pivotal for me in deciding my future so I recommend seeking out these experiences prior to deciding on a college pathway personally.

In college at WSU (go cougs), I got the chance to work as an Orientation Counselor for their New Student Programs and FELL IN LOVE…..this experience of working with high school students, creating magical moments to increase their sense of belonging at the school and guiding their choices for academics, involvement, and more felt like home to me and I was excited to seek that out in my career. Our training was very extensive and included some principals of the Disney Way which has stuck with me throughout my professional and personal life.

And the rest is history really….I sought out experiences in my undergraduate career that would help prepare me for a graduate program in School Counseling, I applied to the best program around, and was the only student in my cohort straight out of undergrad. Two years later, I landed a leave replacement, then a permanent job and am currently obsessed with all things school counseling, 16 years later.

What I love most about being a school counselor:
1. No day is ever the same….I show up to work with a tentative plan and schedule, but then have to be flexible to the needs of students, staff, and families at any particular moment. This helps me feel a sense of urgency and value when I show up to work each morning.

2. I believe that school (especially elementary school) is a huge teacher of healthy RELATIONSHIPS….and reinforcing what a child already knows to be true about healthy caregiving OR rewriting harmful narratives about how caregivers act is very important to me.

3. I get to walk alongside teachers in teaching social emotional learning – all the other stuff besides content that creates healthy humans. Coping skills, responding to mistakes, getting along with others, etc are all skills that can be intentionally taught (and in my mind should be taught each and every day).

4. In my most recent years as a school counselor, I have really loved coaching parents as they navigate difficult situations like domestic violence, suicidal ideation, healing from trauma, adoption and attachment. This portion of the job used to intimidate me big time especially prior to becoming a parent, but I think the adults need as much support as youth in today’s world with so many pressures and threats to our mental health.

5. I get to PLAY every single day – when I come home from work, I can identify at least one (if not several) moments of joy from that day. Whether its me dominating at 4-square during recess or a laughable moment with a co-worker, my job really is full of fun. I also am an extremely extroverted human….so having relationships with so many folks, deepening those relationships, and being able to sing and dance with a microphone blasting music is a perfect combination for me! If schools are not a fun place to be, we are missing the mark and I appreciate my colleagues that feel the same!!!

I am so very grateful for all of the amazing staff and admin I have worked with as a school counselor that support me, my role and prioritize the importance of mental health work with students – unlike others in my field, I have never had an admin (Kevin, Cindy, Mischa, Joel if you’re reading this -thank you) that didn’t support school counseling and my crazy ideas 100% and that means so many students and families have been able to access supports desperately needed from the public school system.

On my school counseling must-haves

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Now that I’m pumping out videos on my Tik Tok account, I tend to get similar questions about resources, book study books, and other tools from my counseling office….and even though I keep answering them in the comments, I thought I’d compile my answers and links all in one blog post for folks to refer to here. Click on image to read more and purchase if interested.

Question: If you were to recommend reading one book about trauma-informed practices (for myself or a book study), what would it be?

Question: If you were to purchase one resource for your first year as a school counselor, what would it be?

Question: If you were to purchase one sensory tool for your office, what would it be?

Question: If you were moving to an admin or behavioral support position, what book would you recommend?

Question: If you were to have one board game in your office, what would it be?

Question: My ________ just became a teacher/school counselor and I want to get them something special. What should I get them?

I am trying to keep my amazon storefront lists current, so if you’re interested in more, feel free to check that out (and help me out along the way)!

What questions am I missing? What products/resources are you interested in?

On the job that I LOVE….and how I show it off

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It is no surprise to anyone that I love my job. I am obsessed with the role of a school counselor and in particular, the prevention and proactive efforts that an elementary school counselor can provide. I also could talk about it for hours upon hours and never get bored (and in fact try to do just at with conference and graduate program presentations when I can).

Unfortunately, part of school counseling (a large part) is done behind closed doors due to protection of confidentiality. So part of our job gets to be communicating what we do to our communities, colleagues and administrators.

Each year, I publish an annual report to showcase how many students were impacted by the school counseling program. Here is a snapshot of the first page so far this year.

I collect this data this throughout the school year by tracking all of my student and parent contacts into one Excel spreadsheet…..then it’s easy to pull information and visuals to share with staff. I have tweaked and edited this spreadsheet to fit my needs but so many folks have asked for a copy, I uploaded it on Teachers Pay Teachers for others to use for their own programs!

In my beginning years as a professional school counselor, I used this time tracking data to advocate for counseling support to grow to meet the needs of more students. I’ve also used it to show what activities produce academic and behavioral growth versus maintaining “feel good” check ins with students.

Although most see the need for school counseling and mental health support in our current state of affairs, when I first began my career in 2007, budgets were tight and school counselors were often on the chopping block of staff cuts. I was a bit relentless in letting stakeholders in my district know how important school counseling programs can be to impact student learning and growth!

Let me know if you have any questions on this resource! Or if you already use it, I would love to hear how it’s helped you and your program!

On teacher Tik Tok

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I am approximately 6 years late to the Tik Tok world….and I’m well aware of my failings as an elder millennial on that piece. I started dabbling during volleyball season this past year and enjoyed the creativity of creating silly videos for the 80-100 folks that were following me at the time.
Vball tik tok

Then I made a small bet incentive for one of my students….if she met some specific goals, I would agree to a TT with her. I posted this on a Friday afternoon and by the following Monday, the video had over 100,000 views! She (and I) were shocked…viral Tik Tok

And then something crazy happened – folks started following me and then watching my old videos. And then those caught on. I loved seeing other teacher creators’ content on the app and also got excited about spreading some “trauma informed schools” knowledge in this space. And slowly but surely….two months later and we’re here at over 5,000 followers (and actually by the time I’m posting this a week later, now over 6,500 followers):

And before you think I’m all serious school counselor-y on the app, let me leave you with my latest video that was just for fun and made me smile (just to myself). Bridgerton Tik Tok

And also, feel free to follow me. As long as you fully acknowledge I am posting this content for strangers only (and if you bring any of my craziness up in person, I will deny it). You’re signing up for a whole lot about school counseling and kids with trauma and a teeny tiny bit of life (if I can convince WB to join me).

Unexpected joys of 2021

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I’ve gotten a few messages from folks receiving our Christmas card checking in on us (thank you btw), where I expressed how hard it was for me to send the card knowing our family was in a state of crisis healing. But what I loved about the creation of the card was going through an entire year of photos and remembering some bright moments that occurred (darn it anxious feelings for taking those away from my frontal lobe).


A few other unexpected JOYS from this year:

  • The silliness of this crew (oh ya and our 3rd place finish – the best JOY yet)!
  • Throwbacks of me and Beej.
  • Decorating my hallway/door at school.
  • Capturing my SC fits on tik Tok (tik Tok in general brings me joy).
  • Holiday decor at Gramma’s.
  • Chats (and silly photos to past players) with T!
  • My friendship with these ladies (and the Nelly concert that was 100/100)!
  • How loving and considerate this boy is.
  • When WG shows up!
  • My monthly calls with my school counseling soulmate!
  • This podcast – life giving every time.

On preparing for “back to school”

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I was dragging my feet for quite a bit preparing for school this Fall. Like many of us, the stress of not knowing so many factors really stunted my excitement level that is usually in OVERDRIVE during this back to school season. Here are a few ways I lit a fire under my own behind to prepare our home, our hearts and our fridges for back to school.

Up first, our mindset. I am working really hard to speak and think positively about the school year. I am colleagues and friends with 100’s of educators literally putting in hours to make this year a successful one filled with all the joys of in-person school as well as the benefits to a child’s social, emotional and academic growth. I want my kiddos to be excited about this new opportunity as well and be overwhelmingly thankful for what their teachers are providing to them.

Bitmojis are all the craze right now with educators but my Wonders loved creating their own. With working and schooling from home, we also created some door signs signifying when it’s okay for family members to enter during the day. Hoping these prevent some WonderBOY zoom bombs during my meetings (along with some creative switching around where zoom cameras are pointing).

One thing we struggled with last Spring was lunch getting too complicated (and honestly taking up too many dishes/uneaten leftovers, etc.). We are going back to food prep on Sundays where the kiddos can grab and go each lunch just as if they were packing their lunches before school. See picture above for our tubs (WB must have something from each bin and then can choose one extra/dessert).

Back to the counseling world means back to cheesy superhero costumes, amazing children’s books about feelings, and a whole school full of students and families to meet!

Oils and all the oils for this back to school transition. We have been relying on diffusers in our work stations and rollerballs like the ones above not only to keep us healthy but mostly to keep our emotions in check during this time. I have loved hosting this workshop for others too who are feeling all the feels during this time. You get this set for FREE when hosting (all you have to do is invite some peeps to a fun online class and I do all the rest). Reach out if you’re interested!!!

Many of my teacher friends have reached out asking what oils are in my “distance learning” survival kit so I created this pic below with my daily must-haves and thought you might want to peek too!!!

I know many of you have been working hard to set up learning spaces in your home. I created this short video for our school district with a ton of great ideas if you need some further inspiration!!!

Wishing you the best of luck this Fall!! It is my hopes to get to writing a bit more so hopefully some other inspiring ideas will be flowing out of this space…..TAKE CARE!

On our recent grief

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On February 20th, I posted the following to my Facebook page:

In a matter of two weeks, so much of my world and my identity that I’ve worked very hard for has been questioned and threatened in ways I never imagined. 
My role as a mom, systems that are supposed to protect, my job, my sports program…..our family and me (along with a whole group of educators) could use some prayers right now to stay afloat. ? So much loss and uncertainty has been hard on all the hearts of Team Hoelzle Brown. 
I don’t usually post this stuff but maybe a little more “messy” on social media feeds will normalize the hard seasons of life and break down some walls between reality and online presences. 
And thank you to our helpers and our support system – I so appreciate you, your words, your check ins and your space when we need it.

And here we are on May 16th and I’m still struggling to put into words what has happened in our family (well and this world with a global pandemic happening) over the course of the past 4 months. There is a part of me that deeply wants to document the pains, the hurts, the injustice we encountered and the lessons learned here but also feel hesitation and don’t want to shame the loved ones involved.

So if you have been wondering, here is a readers’ digest version of our roller coaster the past few months –
1. (Week 1) Allegations were made that put our family in an open CPS and police investigation. This resulted in WonderGIRL not living with us due to a mandated safety plan. And resulting in an uncertain future for both our employment and her remaining in our care. (Identity as Mom and mandated reporter in question)
2. (Week 2) I was notified that my district position was eliminated due to a failed levy in our school district. A position that I am SUPER passionate about and know in my bones is a positive move for our community and for children in general. That same failed levy also put my next volleyball season at risk. (Identify as professional and coach threatened to be removed)
4. (Month 2) Then our state closed and schools closed and all of these traumatized and fragile beings were forced got to be in a house together 24/7 (minus WG) and the pain and the ripple effects during this stay at home order has been complicated at best.
5. (Month 3) 90 days later, CPS determined our case was unfounded (which we already knew) and now we are working to rebuild what a “new normal” looks like within our home…..
6. (Month 4) as the entire world determines what the “new normal” looks like for living, education, and beyond.

And just the irony of this all, if you had checked out my RootedWELL instagram story just days before any of this tsuanami of trauma hit, I was reflecting on “bits and pieces of my life and my interactions all colliding for good and for a purpose that is on fire within me.” And NOW in hindsight I am now considering (not believing yet) that there might be lessons in this for me to use. For me to light my passion even more. And like it says in the picture above, for me to use to help and guide someone else’s survival story.

I read today in an amazing book that I’m reading, “You have to endure the wound in order to heal the pain.” That resonates with me and with the mission we have for WonderGIRL and our family moving forward in a big way…..we endured the wound and now we heal. Prayers and good wishes are continued to be needed and as usual, thank you to our circle of loved ones for the check-ins, the support, the drop everything and come keep me company visits – all so very much appreciated.